Tag Archive for: spiritual growth

Fight Fear with Truth

When you’re facing fear or confronting doubt, one of the best tools at your disposal is what I call a truth journal.

A truth journal is a piece of paper or a section in a spiral notebook or journal in which you write truth statements that you need rooted in your heart. The truth journal supports you during difficult seasons of life. You write in it only truths: This isn’t the place for the fears or falsehoods that come at you like fiery darts, but only for the truth that extinguishes them.

How to Create a Truth Journal

Grab a piece of paper or set apart a section of a spiral notebook or fancy journal. Or see below to download one. List truths, numbering each one so you can distinguish between them easily and more quickly find what you need for the moment.

Here are the dos and don’ts of adding to the truth journal.

2 Corinthians 10:5 is about knowing truth

A truth journal helps you take every thought captive

Do write Scriptures that comfort you

Pray for God to show you verses that will encourage and comfort you, and then open your Bible and read. When you find a Scripture that speaks to your situation, add it to your truth journal. Write shorter passages in full; summarize longer ones with their references. If you’re not familiar with the Bible yet and don’t know where to find God’s promises, ask a mature Christian for help. At the end of this blog, I list some verses for common false beliefs.

Do write truth statements that combat lies

Most of us grew up believing lies of some sort: “You’re only valuable if …” or “You’ll always be a failure.” Ouch. During hard times, these lies can hit us forcefully. Write down the truth that overcomes the lie.

Do sketch truths

If you’re artistically inclined, when an image comes to mind as you’re reading a verse, sketch the image in the truth journal next to the verse. For example, for Psalm 23:4, I have a powerful mental image of the Lord walking through a dark valley with a sheep so I’ve sketched a rough approximation of it. The image will speak to you faster than the written words. When the truth journal isn’t near, it’s easier to remember pictures than words.

Don’t write the lies you’re combatting

In the truth journal, don’t write the lies along with the truth because you don’t want to read those lies ever again—they’ve had too much play in your mind already. Just write the truth. Likewise, this isn’t the place to work out your thoughts.

Don’t write the lies along with the truth … they’ve had too much play in your mind already

Don’t write “positive thinking” statements

Don’t write statements about the future that may not be true. For instance, don’t write, “I will get that job.” Instead, write, “If this is the job God wants me to have, he’ll give it to me. Either way, I can trust him for what’s good for me.”

How to Use the Truth Journal

When you’re in a difficult trial, build the truth journal bit by bit as you find what strengthens you. Read the truth journal before bedtime, first thing in the morning, and every time you start to feel fear or face doubt. Meditate on the truths and what they mean for you today and for your future. Put a few verses from it near the nightlight in the bathroom for use at night. Carry a shortened version in your pocket or purse during the day.

Keep this up until the tough time passes, then set it aside. One day when you face a new faith challenge, grab a fresh piece of paper or set aside a new section in your journal and enter the truth statements that address your new ordeal.

Examples of Truth Statements

Here are a few false beliefs that many people have to fight, along with a verse to get you started and a sample truth statement.

Lie Verse Truth
“God could never forgive me” 1 John 1:9 “I’ve confessed my sins and turned to Jesus as Savior, so God has forgiven me and cleansed me from all unrighteousness.”
“I’m afraid I’ve lost my salvation” John 5:24 “I hear his word and believe in Jesus so I will have eternal life.”
“You’re bad for saying bad things about [person]” Psalm 72:12-14 “It is right to report for the oppressed to report abuse. God commanded the strong to rescue the weak from oppression when they call for help.”
“People will look down on you if …” 1 Corinthians 4:1-5 “God will not look down on me if …, and neither will godly Christians. God’s opinion alone counts.”
“No one will ever believe you if …” Luke 12:1-7 (esp. v. 2) “God knows the truth and he has the power to make the truth known. He will make the truth known on the Judgment Day if not before. Wise, godly people seek out truth.”
“No one will ever love you if …” Romans 8:38-39 “God loves me no matter what. Godly people will love me no matter what.”
“This disease means you’re not valuable to God” Psalm 71 (esp. vv. 9, 20) “I am valuable to God. He values my faithfulness to him through this disease, and he will reward my faithfulness.”
“God let … happen so he must not care about me” Romans 8:28 “God cares about me very much. He has some reason for allowing … to happen, and he will work it for my good.”

Downloadable Truth Journal

The Joy Super Bonus Bundle has a downloadable Truth journal that you can print.

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“I Don’t Feel Forgiven”

“I’m a Christian. I confess my sins like the Bible says, but I don’t feel forgiven. What should I do?”

This is such a common question. Some think their past failures are too great for God to want to forgive them. Others have fallen so many times to the same sin, they’re sure God has given up on them. Still others compare themselves to other Christians who seem so happy and perfect and not messed up like they are, and surmise that God must not have forgiven them or they’d be different.

What can you do when you start to wonder if God has really forgiven you? The key is realizing that feelings follow thoughts, but what we think isn’t always true. Here’s what I mean.

Forgiven in "Return of the Prodigal Son"

A wayward son finds forgiveness and his father’s embrace in “Return of the Prodigal Son” (Rembrandt, circa 1668)

In French 101 in college, I felt sure that my professor didn’t like me … until the day he gave me a French translation of a Peanuts book as a gift because I tried so hard. Till then, I had thought professors liked only the best students, and since I was the only student who had never taken French before and students next to me were doing better, this false belief fed the feeling that he mustn’t like me. When my false belief was proved wrong, my feelings changed and I relaxed in class.

When our feelings contradict reality, we have to teach ourselves truth. Here are five steps you can take to teach yourself the truth about God’s forgiveness.

Teach Yourself 1 John 1:9

First and most important, memorize 1 John 1:9, concentrating on its words so you absorb its meaning:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

Read this verse aloud at least ten times a day to memorize it. Write it on a card or enter it into your cell phone so you can review it often. Think about what it says. How would you feel if God completely cleansed you? He has! So that’s how you should feel now.

Every time you start to feel nagging doubts about being forgiven, quote this verse and thank God for forgiving you: “Thank you, Father, that when I confess my sins, you are faithful and just to forgive my sins and cleanse me from all unrighteousness. I’ve confessed my sins, so thank you that you have forgiven and cleansed me.”

Act Out 1 John 1:9

The more senses we involve when we’re learning something, the better we remember it. Here’s an activity that will help make 1 John 1:9 real to you.

Grab a roll of toilet paper and two pens, one black and one red. Write on the toilet paper in black all the black sins that are bothering you. Tear off the section you’ve written upon and turn it sideways. In red, write out 1 John 1:9 on top of all your sins, imagining it to be like drops of Jesus’ blood shed on the cross for forgiveness of sins. Then flush them! Your sins are gone.

Walk someplace else, kneel, and thank God for washing your sins away.

Repent

Sometimes the reason we don’t feel forgiven is that we haven’t really repented. Repentance doesn’t mean a quick, “I’m sorry”; it means turning away from our sins with the intention of not repeating them, and actually taking steps to block the way back.

For example, Clay and I have known people who have confessed their lusts to God, but they haven’t gotten rid of the porn over which they lusted. That’s not repentance, and without repentance, we won’t have a good conscience.

Take a look at what the Apostle Peter wrote:

For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. 2 Peter 1:5-7

Did you see the words, “make every effort”? God tells us to put effort into adding virtue to our faith. The effort isn’t to achieve salvation or attain forgiveness: it’s so we’ll grow in character. No, we won’t be able to do it without God’s help, but yes, we have a part to play. We get rid of stumbling blocks, we examine whether our lives match God’s instructions, and we think about how to do the things God tells us to do. We pray for God’s help and we do the best we can.

When we live in unrepentant disobedience, the Holy Spirit convicts us of our sin. That can give us the nagging feeling that we’re not forgiven. The answer to this problem is true repentance: turn from disobedience, confess that we’ve been living against God’s will, pray for God’s help, and take steps to change.

Realize that Godliness Increases

In the passage we just looked at, Peter goes on and makes two more important points when it comes to knowing you’re forgiven. Here’s the next:

For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:8

These qualities increase as we walk with God. He grows us, but it takes time. Know that God doesn’t expect you to be perfect overnight and take comfort in the fact that these qualities will increase. Be patient—God isn’t finished with you!

Quit Looking at Past Sin

The next verse in this passage is especially important. Read it carefully and take note of what causes us to lack godly qualities:

For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins. 2 Peter 1:9

Notice here that forgetting you’re forgiven actually causes you to lack the positive character qualities mentioned in verses 5-7, such as “virtue,” “self-control,” “steadfastness,” and “love.” Young Christians often think that if they continually beat themselves up over sin, then they’ll be motivated to do better. But just the opposite is true. When we berate ourselves over past sins, we’re blind to the truth of God’s forgiveness. We need to take our eyes off of our failures and focus them on our God’s love. Why? Because forgetting our past sins are forgiven will keep us from growing these qualities!

Remember you’re forgiven and move on. You’ll gain these qualities in ever increasing amounts.

Come now, let us reason together, says the LORD: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool. Isaiah 1:18

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How to Switch on Spiritual Habits

Many Christians with great intentions set goals for starting new spiritual habits, such as reading through the Bible, having a regular prayer time, or developing faith conversation skills. But real life often waylays our plans, dumping a bag load of discouragement on our backs that makes it hard to stand up and try again.

Bibles and pens for spiritual habits

Set up ahead of time materials needed for spiritual habits

I’ve been scribbling to-do lists since junior high, and while I’ve regularly studied the Bible and prayed for years, in other areas I haven’t fared as well (for instance, memorizing Scripture and doing sit-ups—yeah, the last one’s not spiritual, but still…). So I was intrigued when a friend gave me the bestselling book, Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard,by brothers Chip Heath and Dan Heath. Chip teaches business at Stanford and Dan is a senior fellow at Duke.

The book is packed with insights on making and reaching goals, many of which are helpful for spiritual habits. The first chapter, “Three Surprises About Change,” surprises indeed. College students who nibbled radishes while resisting freshly baked chocolate chip cookies later mustered only eight minutes of trying to solve an unsolvable puzzle, while others who downed cookies and chocolate candies while resisting radishes strove nineteen minutes on the puzzle. This, they say, shows self-control is an exhaustible resource (p. 10).

Right there I thought, how many times have I tried to add four new habits at the same time, thereby letting overreaching defeat me? It’s like trying to set four plates spinning at once.

The authors say that when we’re creating change, we need to address three areas: intellect, emotions, and environment. They portray the intellect as a rider on top of an elephant (the emotions) which is walking down a path (the environment). With engaging stories, they explain how to direct the rider, motivate the elephant, and shape the path for successful change.

Yes, it’s a secular project management/business book, but I found most of the principles in Scripture. I’ll show here how to apply the book’s methods to forming spiritual habits and I’ll tack on supporting verses.

Direct the Rider

The rider (the intellect) makes great plans, but is prone to over-analyzing and wheel-spinning, especially when there are too many options. Directing the rider involves playing to its strengths while avoiding its weaknesses.

The book, "Switch," can help with forming spiritual habits

“Switch” offers tips that apply to forming spiritual habits

Find the Bright Spots. Find people who are succeeding in what you want to do and imitate them. If you’re just starting out in regular devotions, ask around until you find a few people you like who’ve got this down and ask them how they do it. Hint: They’ll probably all say they set aside a specific time of day when they’re at their best.

 “… keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us” Philippians 3:17

 Script the Critical Moves.Figure out the essentials and make a specific but simple plan, such as “I will purchase the Bible version my pastor recommends and I will read through the New Testament five days a week.”

“The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty” Proverb 21:5

Point to the Destination.Know where you’re going and why you want to get there. Perhaps your goal is to read through the New Testament so you’ll know God better.

“I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” Philippians 3:14

Motivate the Elephant

The elephant (the emotions) is bigger than the rider and eventually gets its way when the two disagree. So it’s important to motivate the elephant.

Find the Feeling.What might spark your emotions? When I read a new Bible version, I mark the individual books I’ve finished in the table of contents with a symbol. In one Bible I used daisies because they symbolize celebration and something grown to completion. Just looking at the contents page makes me smile.

“So I saw that there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his work, for that is his lot…” Ecclesiastes 3:22

Shrink the Change.Plan manageable steps to prevent demoralization. For instance, if you’re reading your Bible for the first time, plan ten minutes per day for five days per week, not an hour a day for seven days per week. Read the short Bible books first so the marks on your contents page fill up quickly while you’re getting started.

“For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?” Luke 14:28

Grow.Cultivate an identity of who you are: “I’m a child of God getting to know God’s words.” Realize there will be ups and downs, and that’s okay.

“I can do all things through him who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13

Shape the Path

Shape the path (the environment) to help the rider and elephant keep traveling down it. Just as a dieter could toss all the junk food and fill the refrigerator with carrots and broccoli so that when her stomach growled, her eyes would see only healthy choices, so we can shape the path towards devotionals.

Many churches start new Bible studies in September and January. Check now to see what your church may be offering!

Tweak the Environment.Choose a comfortable chair near good lighting that will be your regular spot. Place your Bible and a pen nearby. Turn off your cell phone.

“Ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure” Proverb 4:26

Build Habits.Action triggers triple your chances of success. An action trigger can be as simple as planning what time you’ll do what and where. Attaching a new habit to an established habit is even better. For instance, when I decided to make my main prayer time separate from my Bible reading time, I set it to follow an established habit: lunch!

“On the first day of every week, each of you is to put something aside and store it up, as he may prosper …” 1 Corinthians 16:2

Rally the Herd.Get family members or a friend to do this with you. Join a Bible study group—the accountability there is a great motivator.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

I hope these nine tips for forming spiritual habits inspire you on your spiritual journey.

Which of these have you found helpful for forming spiritual habits?

Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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Weaknesses & Learning to Walk

Seeing the heavenly Father’s patience with our weaknesses isn’t always easy.

Years ago a young man barely out of high school asked me how he could know God still loved him despite his repeated failings.

weaknesses

At ten months, I found walking on grass a challenge!

People had told him God is a loving and patient Father who forgives sin, and had given him many verses, but he wasn’t sure God could keep loving him when he failed so often at things with which others seemed to have little difficulty. Even the fact that he couldn’t grasp the verses the way others did was, in his mind, a failure.

I knew he’d grown up with a demanding father who showed little love and acceptance, but he believed his father’s lack of patience with him was justified (hadn’t his dad told him so?). Hearing that God is like a patient father naturally caused him to see God as having his earthly father’s limited patience.

I asked him if he’d ever watched parents teach a child to walk. He said yes, he often had dinner with his older brother and his wife, who had a young child.

I asked, “When the child fell on his diaper the first time he tried to walk, did your brother yell at him?”

“Of course not!”

“When he fell a second time, did they spank him?”

“No! How could you ask that?!?”

“When he continued to fall as he tried to walk, did they give up on him and tell him he’d never make it?”

“No, you don’t understand them at all!”

“Then did they praise his attempts, and embrace him when he fell?”

He nodded, but I could see he didn’t catch the connection.

I told him that parents know a child will tumble many times while trying to walk. They delight in his attempts, even though they’re not initially successful. They care only that he keeps trying, for they know that with their help he’ll succeed. The only reaction that would displease them is if the child after falling decided, “That’s enough. I don’t like falling. I’m going to give up trying and just be satisfied with crawling.”

God's patience with our weaknesses is like a father helping a baby take his first step

My friend Matt helping his son take first steps

I said, “God’s patience with our weaknesses is like your brother’s patience with his son’s imperfect walking. God is teaching you to walk. He’s delighted with your attempts, and doesn’t mind that you fall as you learn to walk. In fact, when you fall, picture him scooping you into his arms to assure you he’s pleased with your attempts, just like your brother does with his son.”

He grinned. “That makes sense,” he said. “That really makes sense.”

Some time later, he told me that analogy was a turning point in his spiritual walk. He finally believed God loved him. I think just as important as the analogy was that he finally had someone to model God’s love more correctly.

And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. ~Luke 15:20

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Make Room to Grow

Last spring I decided to grow lettuce because I was tired of tossing bags of limp leaves from the refrigerator when I was hoping to make a salad or sandwich wrap.

Young lettuce plants grow below amaryllis blooms

In April, young lettuce leaves peek from below amaryllis blooms

I knew I’d have to use clay pots near our house since rabbits would devour lettuce farther away, so I checked how many I could turn to that use. If I planted some with the arugula, gave up a pot of carrots, and mingled others with early blooming flowers, I’d have three pots—plenty!

So I headed to Plant Depot and bought a pony-pack each of romaine and red leaf lettuce. Back home, I planted the three pots, nestling red leaf lettuce among just sprouting amaryllises in one of them. I figured when the amaryllises finished blooming, the growing lettuce leaves would hide their fading leaves and within weeks take their place entirely.

All went well … for awhile.

Stunted lettuce heads grow among amaryllis bulbs

In May, lettuce growing among amaryllises hasn’t grown

But by mid-spring the lettuce tucked among the amaryllises was stunted and tough, while the other plants were round and tender.

That’s when it hit me. Amaryllises aren’t annuals—plants that completely die back after blooming. They’re bulbs, so even though what’s on the surface dies back, what’s under the soil multiplies. The lettuce roots had no room to grow and couldn’t produce good leaves.

Amused at my cluelessness, I thought, Isn’t this just like what happens when we try to add a new spiritual habit without making space for it?

After all, adding a spiritual habit doesn’t happen magically and usually requires us to give something up.

For example:

Several healthy lettuce heads grow in a clay pot

In May, romaine and red leaf lettuce grow happily in their own pot

  • Regularly spending time with God by reading the Bible and praying helps us know God and draw close to him (Joshua 1:8; Matthew 6:6; 2 Timothy 3:16). To make spending time with God a habit we might decide to give up one daily sitcom or fifteen minutes of Internet surfing. (After all, don’t we have time for what we really want to do?)
  • If I want to share the gospel better, I might memorize key verses (1 Peter 3:15). To accomplish this, I might spend ten minutes of every lunch break memorizing instead of relaxing with co-workers or a book.
  • If I’m a poor listener, perhaps I’ll spend a day listening to others and drawing them out, while giving up sharing my own stories and the advice that’s always at the tip of my tongue (James 1:19).
  • If I’m a worrier, I could commit to spending a day casting every care upon God with thanksgiving, while refusing to think about potential outcomes and solutions (Philippians 4:6-7).
  • If I decide to give more money to the poor or to missions, I’ll have less to spend on something else.

Nestling lettuce amongst amaryllises doesn’t work, so if you feel God tugging you to take on a spiritual habit of eternal value—make space for it.

If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. ~Luke 9:23

 

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The Complaining Fast

The first sunny Saturday after two weeks of rain, I donned blue gardening gloves, grabbed  weeding fork and  pronged hoe, and headed to the backyard. I found the variegated nasturtiums I’d sown around the now gone summer annuals had sprouted nicely, but so had clumps of dark red oxalis, thick sprigs of mint, and sprays of apple-green asparagus fern.

Complaining needs mattock

Mattock

It’s not that these plants aren’t attractive, but they’re invasive intruders that send underground runners that twist around other plants’ roots, sometimes killing them. They’d have to go, but to painstakingly detangle each from the nasturtiums would take more hours than I had.

I called Clay over to show him the dilemma. He grabbed his mattock (its head is like a heavy hoe on one side and an axe on the other). Five minutes of hacking and thuds sent every plant flying … including nasturtiums. Earthy and minty scents surrounded us. With fingers and hoe, I carefully sifted the soil, removing every bit of root and tuber hiding beneath the surface. Later when we were certain the flowerbed was cleared, we planted a strong-rooted blue-flowered potato bush.

Some parts of our spiritual lives are like flowerbeds that need to have everything pulled so we can plant afresh.

For instance, take complaining. One day while thinking over “Do everything without complaining or arguing” (Philippians 2:14), I realized I’d grumbled a bit the previous few days. Maybe more than a bit—in fact, enough that I knew I needed a big change.

But the problem was some things that fall under the label of complaint are legitimate: sending back an overcooked restaurant rib eye, for instance, or carrying out Jesus’ directives to talk to those who’ve wronged us. Yet complaining is one of those things that always seem right at the moment and only upon reflection appear otherwise.

I knew if I tried to stop just the “bad” complaining, in the nanosecond of deciding whether I should pull what was approaching my lips, I’d make a lot of mistakes.

So I decided to do a 24-hour fast of all complaining, good or bad. Fasting is temporarily giving up something legitimate as a discipline and offering.

I discovered some things:

  • I wasn’t dealing with just a few little sprouts here and there, but deep running roots trying to push out shoots much more often than I thought.
  • Ninety-five percent of the complaints I yanked needed yanking. Ouch.
  • It was harder than I thought and I didn’t quite succeed, so I extended the fast one extra day for more soil sifting. That gave me a cleared plot into which I could plant what was valid.
  • For weeks after the fast I was keenly aware of when I was about to be negative, allowing me to pause and think before speaking.
  • When I did have to address something negative, I sounded less cranky.

The 24-hour complaining fast was so helpful I’ve repeated it throughout the years whenever I’ve noticed grumble weeds growing.

If you’ve never tried a complaining fast before, why not give it a try? Let me know how it goes.

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe ~Philippians 2:14-15

 

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Learning from Betrayal

A young woman recently asked about betrayal:

Learning from betrayalAfter praying and fasting, I clearly felt God’s blessing on a dating relationship. But when we were about to get engaged a year later, he confessed the marriage would be a cover for his active gay lifestyle. How does one get past God letting us think he’s leading us toward something with special blessing, when He’s actually intending something completely different, knowing it’ll cause us pain? I feel God betrayed me. [1]

 

I am so sorry for the pain this man’s betrayal caused. To discover someone we trusted and thought we knew has deceived us is quite a shock, and it’s natural to begin to doubt others’ honesty and intentions when struck like this.

I’m thankful you’re searching for answers. It will take time before you know fully what good God intends to work through this; indeed, you may not know all in this lifetime. In the meantime, immerse yourself in Scriptures. There you’ll see how others handled betrayal, including Jesus, Joseph, David, the patriarchs, and the apostles. You’ll also grow in understanding God and the big picture of what he is doing in this world.

Although there are numerous examples in the Bible of godly people who prayed and yet had life turn out differently than expected, I find Jeremiah the most helpful because of his candor as he worked through his feelings. During a time I dealt with a betrayal, I read Jeremiah repeatedly, finding comfort in knowing my experience was not unique, assurance that betrayal by people does not equal betrayal by God, and hope in God’s power to work great good through suffering.

Here are some of the things God worked in Jeremiah’s life through suffering and betrayal. You may discover God works some of these in your life as well.

God teaches us to discern his voice better

Jeremiah learning from betrayal

“The Prophet Jeremiah” from the Sistine Chapel, by Michelangelo (public domain)

When God first called Jeremiah to be a prophet and gave Jeremiah a message of pending destruction if Judah did not repent, Jeremiah was confused and asked God why he had been deceiving the people by telling them through other prophets that all was going to be well with Judah (Jer. 4:10). God explained the prophets Jeremiah had been listening to had spoken falsely in his name: he had not given them the words of peace and assurance they proclaimed and which merely fit what the people wanted to hear (Jer. 5:12, 31). What Jeremiah had been told were God’s words were not, and God helped him grow in discerning what was from God and what wasn’t.

Even those without the incredible prophetic giftedness of Jeremiah can grow in discerning God’s guidance better. When I was a young Christian, some of the teaching I heard about how to discern God’s will and voice turned out to be wrong, and part of the way I discovered that was through having situations turn out differently than I expected. Since God does not lie, I knew my understanding was mistaken so I sought guidance in Scripture and from God, and I grew, just as Jeremiah did and just as you will.

God teaches us wisdom

One of the ways we become wise and grow in the knowledge of good and evil is by living through the effects of both good and evil. Sometimes when we pray for wisdom, God grants that request by allowing us to go through eye-opening experiences.

As God continued his first message to Jeremiah, Jeremiah cried out in anguish because he did not think his fellow Israelites deserved punishment. God assured him if he could find one honest person in Jerusalem, he would forgive the city (Jer. 5:1). Though Jeremiah searched, he found no one.

Even so, it was years before he understood what God meant by cordial words hiding what is hidden in the heart (Jer. 9:8). Jeremiah did not understand the depths of the depravity around him until his prophetic words tested people’s hearts and he saw their ways with his own eyes (Jer. 6:27, 11:19).

God teaches us discernment about people

Despite God’s warning to Jeremiah not to trust the people around him (Jer. 9:4-6), Jeremiah found it hard not to. When he discovered a plot against his life, his anger burst out not only against his betrayers (Jer. 11:18-20), but against God (Jer. 12:1-4). God exhorted Jeremiah to continue his work, to remember his warnings about whom not to trust, and to trust him for justice (Jer. 12:5-7). Over the 40 years that Jeremiah prophesied, he grew in discerning the wicked (Jehoiakim), the weak (Zedekiah), and the godly (Josiah and Ebed-Melech). He also learned that God was with him even when people betrayed him.

I was betrayed once by a church leader. I had seen warning signs, but wrote them off, naively thinking someone lacking spiritual maturity wouldn’t be in leadership, and that because God loves truth no one would believe the falsehoods going around anyway (I initially thought them correctable mistakes and only later learned they were intentional lies). I learned discernment the hard way. But I also learned God was with me and was teaching me important lessons. God promises to work all things for your good, and you will learn and grow through this too.

God exposes wolves in sheep’s clothing

Early in Jeremiah’s ministry, people didn’t know which prophets to believe, a situation that greatly displeased God. After Jeremiah had prophesied about three decades, the prophet Hananiah came out strongly against him, making it plain that both could not be true prophets (Jer. 28). When Jeremiah pronounced God’s judgment of death on Hananiah for making people trust a lie and Hananiah did die, God exposed the false and true prophets. Godly people knew whom to trust, while the ungodly chalked Jeremiah’s words up to coincidence.

As painful as your situation is, the deception came out before a marriage would make it even more painful. God granted wisdom and exposed a sham. Hopefully this exposure will prevent the man from hurting others.

God strengthens us

When God called Jeremiah to be a prophet, Jeremiah protested that he was a child who didn’t know how to speak. God promised to make him into a bronze wall (Jer. 1:6, 18) that could withstand the attacks of the priests, kings, and people who would fight against him. Apparently, Jeremiah thought this meant he wouldn’t feel the pain of the attacks. When the persecution increased, Jeremiah cried out over his pain and asked if God had deceived him (15:18).

But God had not promised Jeremiah a pain-free ministry. Part of the reason God punishes those who act evilly is that they inflict unjust pain on others. In this instance, God rebuked Jeremiah, called him to repent of his worthless words, and reminded him of his promise to make him a bronze wall that could not be prevailed against (Jer. 15:19-20). Jeremiah had received evidence enough of God’s faithfulness and promises to deserve the rebuke, and he repented.

God did indeed make him into a bronze wall, but not by making him insensitive to pain; rather, he taught him to trust in God’s faithfulness and to endure despite hardship.

God comforts so we can comfort others

Jeremiah suffered insults, mocking, death threats, imprisonments, and beatings. Sorrow at times overwhelmed him (Jer. 5:18). But God cared deeply about Jeremiah’s pain, and he cares about your pain too.

Jeremiah grew spiritually as he saw God’s faithfulness amidst human unfaithfulness, and he came to trust God fully. When his prophecies about the fall of Jerusalem came to pass, he responded not with smugness, but with compassion. He knew by then that the pain of exile was the only way the wayward Hebrews could have hope and a future (Jer. 29:11). He tenderly ministered to the distressed people around him through Lamentations, passing the comfort God gave him on to others (2Co. 1:4).

Through the pain and sorrow, here’s what Jeremiah had learned:

Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men. Lamentations 3:32-33

Draw close to the God of all comfort. I’m praying for you.

  1. [1]The question is edited for brevity and anonymity.↩
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We Will Bear Fruit

Oil painting of grapesJesus taught us he is a vine and we are his branches.[1] As long as we remain in him, we will bear fruit, for we have a heavenly Father as vinedresser, pruning and caring for us. It may take time for a branch to bear fruit, but our Father knows what he’s about, and as long as we remain in Jesus, we will bear fruit, fruit that will show we are Jesus’ disciples: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.[2] We remain in Jesus by obeying him.[3] Jesus explains why he tells us all this: that his joy may be in us and that our joy may be full, complete, missing nothing.[4]

There we have it. Jesus means for us to have joy, and we will, if we stick to him. As his life flows through us, buds one day appear, and then the blossoms of desire. The beauty of the flowers delights, but doesn’t last. This should not discourage us, however, for falling petals are a part of the fruiting process. If the branch stays attached, underneath where the flowers once were, the fruit begin to swell and grow until one day they abundantly fill the branches.

Excerpt from Philippians: Steps to Joy & Peace (forthcoming).

  1. [1]John 15:1-8.↩
  2. [2]Galatians 5:22.↩
  3. [3]John 15:10.↩
  4. [4]John 15:11.↩
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Disbelief and a Broken Tooth

Jackie with her front tooth fixed

We found ten-year-old Jackie crying next to the pool, waiting for us. She’d been our foster daughter for just a short time, but she came quickly into our arms. She was still damp and the scent of chlorine clung to her. Gently pushing blond hair from her face, I said, “Let me see, Jackie.” She opened her swollen lips to display the front tooth broken off in a sharp slanted line.

My husband said, “We’ll call the dentist just as soon as we get home, Jackie. He’ll fix your tooth right away.”

After a few more minutes of making sure she was otherwise okay and assuring her that her tooth was fixable, my husband asked, “Jackie, why ever did you dive head-first into the shallow end of the pool?”

“No one told me not to,” she said.

“That’s not true, Jackie,” I said, surprised. “We told you many times not to dive into the shallow end because you could get hurt.”

She wailed, “I didn’t believe you! I thought you were trying to keep me from fun.”

How often are we like that with God, thinking his commands deny us good things? Our disbelief that God’s intentions are good can result in broken teeth like these:

  • A young mom lies rather than learning to tell the truth in love: Her family doesn’t trust her.
  • A wife refuses to forgive: Her marriage and faith crumble.
  • A teenage girl sleeps around: She’s a mother even though she still needs one herself.
  • A teenage boy dabbles in drugs: Addiction ruins his education and confidence.
  • A couple covets their friends’ lifestyles: They’re crushed by debt.
  • A husband indulges in porn: His wife is hurt and feels inadequate.

This list could go on endlessly, couldn’t it? Who hasn’t dived into the shallow end of some pool of disobedience and come out with broken teeth—or worse?

After her accident, Jackie believed our rule was meant for her good and resolved to never dive into the shallow end of a pool again (that’s true, isn’t it, Jackie?). Of course, no preteen believes every parental warning, but God does expect grown-ups who profess Christianity to believe that the Creator of the universe gives his commands out of love, to acknowledge he knows best, and to resolve to obey him.

Righteous are you, O LORD, and your laws are right. The statutes you have laid down are righteous; they are fully trustworthy. Psalms 119:137-138

Related:

Chasing Crows

Working Out Your Salvation?

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Joseph: Triumph Over Betrayal

Painting of 'La Tunica de Jose'
‘La Tunica de Jose’ by Jose Vergara Gimeno (1726-1799), collection of Joan J. Gavara (Valencia)

Most of us have been betrayed. Perhaps we were abused as a child, abandoned by a spouse, falsely accused, denied what was promised, lured into trusting the untrustworthy, or deceived into commitment. Betrayal struck Joseph the son of Jacob more than once.

Joseph’s ten older brothers were jealous that their father favored Joseph and sold him into slavery when he was seventeen. He served his slave master Potiphar faithfully, but Potiphar jailed him after hearing a false accusation. An inmate he’d aided forgot his promise to help clear his name, leaving Joseph imprisoned until he was thirty.

Yet Joseph triumphed over these betrayals. How did he do it?

Joseph stayed faithful to God

Joseph lived and spoke in such a way that his faith in God was obvious and caused his new master, Potiphar, to believe Joseph’s successes were God-given (Genesis 39:3). Rather than seeing his hardships as justification for abandoning God, when Potiphar’s wife tried to seduce him, Joseph rebuffed her, saying, “How could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?” (39:9). In prison and before Pharaoh, Joseph made his faith and trust in God known (40:8, 41:16).

Joseph served faithfully wherever he was

Instead of allowing injustices to poison his attitude, Joseph served Potiphar and the prison warden faithfully and fully. Both promoted him to their most trusted positions (39:4, 22). His faithfulness in low positions developed character as well as administrative and leadership skills he later needed as Pharaoh’s second-in-command.

Joseph embraced God’s blessings in the midst of suffering

Joseph recognized God’s presence and blessing under Potiphar and the prison warden (39:2, 21). When Pharaoh released him from prison and promoted him, he said God made him forget his troubles and his father’s household, and made him fruitful in this land of suffering (41:51-52). He didn’t whitewash his difficulties, but he embraced God’s blessings in the midst of hardships.

Joseph restored relationship with repentant betrayers

When Joseph’s older brothers came to buy grain from him during a famine more than two decades after betraying him, they didn’t recognize him. This allowed him to test whether they had changed, for forgiving doesn’t require restoring relationship with those who have intentionally wronged us and remain unrepentant.

Joseph told them to bring his younger brother, Benjamin—his father’s favorite after Joseph—upon their return. When they did, he served a meal during which he watched the brothers when he gave Benjamin five times the food he gave the rest. He then arranged matters so the older brothers would think Benjamin had stolen a silver cup and they could therefore legitimately abandon Benjamin to slavery, just as they had abandoned Joseph so many years before. Their responses showed Joseph two things:

  • The brothers admitted their sin. Joseph overheard his brothers’ regrets over sinning against Joseph and their admissions that they deserved punishment (42:21-23).
  • The brothers had changed. The brothers didn’t respond jealously when he showed Benjamin favor (43:34). All the brothers tore their clothes in anguish when the silver cup was found in Benjamin’s possession, rather than gloating over his fall (44:13). Judah offered to take Benjamin’s place as Joseph’s slave (44:33), proving they had no intention of abandoning the youngest.

Satisfied, Joseph revealed himself and offered not just restored relationship, but provision (45:9-11).

Joseph recognized that God used the betrayals for good

Joseph’s understanding of the good God had brought through his sufferings was so ingrained in him that immediately upon revealing himself he was able to tell his brothers not to be angry with themselves over what they had done to him, for God had used it to save lives (Genesis 45:4). It is here that his faith in God’s hand in his life is most poignantly portrayed, for he shows not a hint of bitterness. Yes, God had allowed him to suffer, but God had worked all for good.

Joseph forgave his brothers

Joseph’s faith in God’s working all the events of his life for good enabled him to fully forgive his brothers. After their father, Jacob, died the brothers feared Joseph’s wrath and offered themselves as slaves. Joseph’s speech to his brothers demonstrated five foundations for forgiveness:

  • Don’t be afraid—Joseph offered mercy and assured them he would not enslave them as they deserved.
  • Am I in the place of God?—Joseph refused personal vengeance, for he knew only God can avenge wrongs (Romans 12:19). Indeed, only God can justly avenge for only God sees the heart.
  • You intended to harm me—Joseph forgave without minimizing or excusing. True forgiveness forgives actual wrongs without excusing them as being less serious than they are. He didn’t base his forgiveness on a false assumption of ignorance or weakness; rather, he forgave intentional sin.
  • God intended it for good— Forgiveness requires faith that God can and will work all things for the good of those who love him (Romans 8:28). Joseph believed God intended his sufferings for good, and he helped his brothers see that God worked their failings for good.
  • I will provide for you—Joseph offered grace by extending undeserved blessings.

Triumphing over betrayal requires faith in God’s power and love: He can and will work all things for our good.

But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them. ~Genesis 50:19-21

 ***

For more on the life of Joseph, see The Story lesson 3.

 

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Shine by Scrubbing Spiritual Grime

Twice I stopped dicing onions and alerted my husband he was blocking my light. Wondering if a fluorescent bulb in the kitchen ceiling fixture had gone out, he climbed atop a chair and carefully removed the first of two lighting panels. As he lowered it to the ground, the light in the room doubled. It turned out that the aged, yellowed panel now blocked more light than it diffused.

Painting of sunrise

From “Joy Comes in the Morning” by Rae Jones

When he removed the second panel, we found two more problems: One bulb was indeed dead, and the other barely glowed from its failing electrical ballast.

In the morning as I started tidying in the increased light, I noticed the cobalt blue mixer which usually blended in to the royal blue walls now stood out. But it didn’t shine. I examined it closely and found—ugh—a thin grimy film previously invisible.

I scrubbed nearly the entire kitchen while Clay replaced light fixtures, bulbs, and lighting panels. Four pots of hot, soapy water and half a cup of bleach later, the kitchen sparkled under the new, bright lights.

The old lights had dimmed so gradually over eighteen years that I’d no idea how much light we’d lost.

Which is exactly what can happen in our spiritual lives: We can drift from God’s light so slowly that we don’t realize we no longer see clearly the spiritual grime that needs cleaning.

Spiritual Grime

Jesus said people who fear light exposing bad deeds stay out of the light, but those who live by truth come into the light (John 3:20-21). Part of walking in light and truth is admitting our sins to God and receiving his forgiveness and purification:

If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:6-9

Though God cleanses us when we in faith turn to Jesus as Savior and Lord, as we traverse this world, our feet get dirty and need regular washing. That’s why Jesus told Peter, “The one who has bathed does not need to wash, except for his feet, but is completely clean” (John 13:10).

Five Ways to Walk in Light

How do we walk in the light so we know when our feet need cleansing?

1. Examine Life under Scripture’s Light

Just as I examined my counter accoutrements under good light, so I can examine my life under Scripture’s light. When I read what pleases and displeases God, I can reflect on how well my life matches. For instance, when I read Paul’s Colossians 3:8-9 list of what to dispose of—anger, rage, malice, slander, filthy language, and lying—I can pause at each to consider if they’re MIA.

2. Bring Weaknesses to God Daily

Because stainless steel surfaces show fingerprints even in dim light, I know they need extra attention and I polish them almost daily. Likewise, in my daily prayers, I can bring before God my weaknesses that need extra attention, praying, “See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:23).

3. Confess Sins Immediately

We all know it’s important to wipe up spills as soon as they happen. Similarly, we should address anything we notice wrong immediately. For example, the instant we have an envious thought, we can confess it and replace it with thanksgiving for what we have. The Apostle John said, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Confessing immediately is like wiping up a spill as soon as we see it.

4. Get Help from Experienced Mentors

Our 25-year old countertop tiles are cracked and the grout is chipped and discolored beyond bleach’s power. While we could retile ourselves, rather than continuing to battle grout, we plan to hire an experienced installer to put in a solid surface. In the same way, if we continue to battle a particular weakness, it may be time to get experienced help in the form of an accountability partner, a counselor, or an addiction recovery program.

5. Rejoice in God’s Mercy

After I finished scrubbing my kitchen under the bright new lights, I stood back and admired how the mixer and glass canisters sparkled. In the same way, when we’ve acknowledged and repented of our sins, we should recognize that God has forgiven us and washed us clean.

We should never try to punish ourselves because that shows a lack of faith that Jesus’ work on the cross was enough to cleanse us. Nor should we berate ourselves as bad, for God said, “Do not call anything impure that God has made clean” (Acts 10:15). We should accept God’s forgiveness and move forward. After all, “whoever lacks” virtue, godliness, etc.,  “is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins” (2 Peter 19).

The blood of Jesus purifies us from all sin. That’s something to rejoice about!

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The Sea Monster of Envy

Angry, I marched into my co-worker’s gray cubicle and ducked behind its low wall so I wouldn’t be overheard. “They promoted the less-qualified person just because they promised her before we were hired.”

Painting of sea monter by Justin Sweet

"The Eye of Charon" by Justin Sweet. Copyright Justin Sweet. Used by permission.

Her brows furrowed. “Don’t say that! You don’t know their criteria.”

I winced—she was right.

While it was true that the director had told me I was more technically skilled than the gal he’d promoted and his decision was based partly on the VP’s prior promise to the team’s senior member, he also said that those weren’t the only factors considered. He gave me a promotion and raise (“The technical tract is just as important as the managerial tract,” he said), but that didn’t mollify my disappointment much because, frankly, covetousness had seeped in like brackish water and a swirling green serpent now swam in its depths.

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? We want something—badly. Perhaps a job promotion we’re sure we’re the best for, or a perfect new something we can’t quite afford, or the shining honor, or the relationship with someone special. We’re sure we deserve it, but someone else gets it instead.

And envy slithers into the cold murky water of craving and lifts its searching eyes.

That’s a problem that needs addressing quickly: “For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice” (James 3:16).

So how do we conquer the sea monster of Envy before its ravenous jaws devour?

1) Repent

Craving what belongs to someone else is coveting, and God’s finger etched “You shall not covet” onto a stone tablet. Envy is sin too because love doesn’t envy (1Co. 13:4). So every time I feel an envious urge, I ask God to forgive both my covetousness and my envy; I pray for his help; and I ask for deliverance from spiritual enemies eager to use my frailty for discord.

2) Dump the “I Deserve More” Attitude

Since God is the ultimate Boss, I know I deserve nothing he doesn’t give me. (Even what I might “deserve” is due only to gifts he’s given me anyway.) Besides, God tells me not to seek earthly honors, but rather to seek honor from him. Phil. 2:3 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” In my situation, that didn’t mean I should consider my new boss’s programming skills better than mine (she wasn’t a programmer), but it did mean I should consider her more worthy of honor. I committed myself to respect, honor, and support her.

3) Submit to God

God could have worked it out for me to get the position, but he didn’t. So I submitted to his will and trusted that he had me where he wanted me to be, and when he wanted me elsewhere, he’d work out the details. He promises that if I seek his kingdom and his righteousness first, he’ll give me everything else I need (Mat. 6:33), so I made those my focus. I did the best job I could, and I looked for ways to further his kingdom.

After all, I work for God. Whether I’m successful doesn’t depend on the world’s standard of elevated position, but whether I’m doing my best for God in whatever position I find myself, even if it’s lowly (2Co. 10). After all, Jesus said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all” (Mk. 9:34).

4) Don’t Think Too Highly of Myself

We all know people with unjustifiably high opinions of themselves. In humbling times, it’s good to examine whether we’re following Paul’s command: “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment” (Rom. 12:3). While it was true I had better technical skills and a mite bit more management experience, when I thought about it, I realized that didn’t mean I would be better at this job. She definitely had stronger relationships throughout the company, and, well, she took things in stride better than I.

5) Pray for the Success of Those I’ve Envied

When the Babylonians took the Jews captive, Jeremiah told the exiles to pray for the prosperity of their new city, for if it prospered, so would they (Jer. 29:7). What? Pray for the nation whose might they envied despite the fact that the Babylonians were wicked and undeserving? Yes, that’s what God said. I began praying for my new boss to succeed. I quickly learned that praying for the success of someone I’ve envied transforms my attitude.

In fact, while it was important in that secular job, it’s even more important in ministry. God calls each of us to play a part in the big scheme of what he’s doing in the world, and praying for others’ success in what God calls them to do focuses our eyes on God’s kingdom, not our own. After all, that’s our purpose in his kingdom, isn’t it?

Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. ~1 Peter 2:1

What helps you dispel envy?

 

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